Saur Kids

Please Proceed to...

2005-09-02T18:57:00.000-04:00

The Saurly Yours blog. Sadly, I've been too swamped lately to write much in this blog, but I blog daily in the other one. Thanks for visiting!

Those Fake Whiny "Popular Girl" Accents

2005-07-11T21:58:00.000-04:00

What is up with those stupid, acquired accents? You know the ones I mean: the whiny, valleygirl style accent. They even have learned to laugh annoyingly: the flat heh heh heh.

We have a darling little teenage friend who has acquired this accent. She's beautiful, and anyone who hears her talk is surprised to find that she is also intelligent, because she sounds like a moron. I love this girl dearly, and can't bring myself to say anything to her. She thinks she is being cool, I'm sure.

But her parents speak well, and I sometimes wonder how they can go through their daily existence with her voice grating on them at all times. It must grate on them! How could it not? It would be like being married to Fran Drescher. Beautiful to look at, but prettier if she's muzzled. To be fair to Fran, she was born with that accent. But why would anyone want to acquire one?

I hear the accent all the time. They're on the radio requesting songs or flirting with the DJs. And when young girls are interviewed on the TV, their voices saw through the airwaves like a rusty blade. The party girls are the ones who have it, but they're not the only ones. If you're a Pop Tart like Christina Aguillera you have it, too.

When will someone convince these girls that this flirty accent screams 'cheap' and 'foolish'? It may fly in the bedroom, but it won't fly in the boardroom.

Water Parks & Disease

2005-07-09T06:54:00.000-04:00

OK, maybe I'm just a neurotic mom. But, I can't bring myself to go to Adventure Island when it's packed with people. When I see one kid per square foot, I see imaginary rivers of pee. I don't care how much chlorine they use. Chlorinated pee is still pee.

My kid got something called giardia a couple years ago. We had never heard of it before. The pediatrician told us that it was a parasite which was most likely contracted in a public pool. It was during the summer time, and we had been going to Adventure Island, and another local little water park, and any pool we ran across. Who knows where the giardia came from, but it overstayed it's welcome. I have this really weird problem: I think about parasites and my stomach starts to churn. It's not as bad as it used to be, but it still happens. So, imagine my joy at being told this.

It's a couple years later, and we just went to Adventure Island again but we never got in the gate. It was too crowded, and I simply couldn't handle it.

What are your thoughts about this? Should I get over it, or do I have something to be concerned about?

Stepfathers vs. Stepsons

2005-07-08T10:35:00.000-04:00

I read somewhere that stepfathers have a difficult time accepting boys that are from other relationships. Perhaps, it was suggested, it is due to evolution. Possibly the male of the species only wished to continue his line, and the line of a rival wouldn't have been tolerated. (When faced with this dilemma, male lions kill their rival's cubs.) In these civilized times, many or most stepsons are tolerated by these stepfathers with hidden unease, or outright hostility.

Whatever the reason, I have repeatedly seen stepfathers who have trouble accepting their stepsons. This isn't usually the case with stepmothers and daughters (though I know it exists). I believe it's because women are naturally nurturers and are less territorial than men are.

I have a friend who was almost hysterical this morning because her other half (let's call him John) continues to treat her son badly. When talking to his own daughter, John speaks gently and with amused tolerance. If his daughter does something wrong, he says affectionately, "What did you think you were doing, you idiot? Don't do that again."

But if my friend's son does the exact same thing, John will say it entirely differently - with a growl in his voice, and vicious emphasis. My friend is always taxed, trying to be the mediator between them both and fighting the uphill battle of making John see that he needs to change. She is considering ending it with John, because she doesn't wish to live with this endless stress forever and she believes it could eventually impact her son. It hasn't yet, because she has remained ever-vigilant. But why should anyone be forced to be on guard at all times within her own home? It's a recipe for ulcers.

I don't know what to tell her. Love can be a very complicated problem.

Adolescence

2005-07-06T09:24:00.000-04:00

My friend's son just had a birthday. He hopped in the car with her early in the afternoon and they began to drive. "Guess what *I* got for my birthday this year?" he prompted his mom. "What?" she asked, unsuspecting. "Hair on my balls," he replied. She almost swerved into the oncoming lane.

Her son is now passing from being her child into being a man. She had the usual talk with him about what changes he needed to expect (she has always talked openly with him about sex) but she is left wondering: "If my son is aging, then what am *I* doing?" and "Oh brother, here come the teen years."

Many years ago, the Jewish people believed that a boy became a man at the age of 12. Now our boys are considered men at 18. At 18 they can go to war, but they can't drink. They can make adult decisions (with hormones raging) but studies show their mind isn't fully developed until they're 25 (and the part that isn't developed is the decision making portion of the brain).

Is adolescence the beginning of a boy becoming a man, or merely a passageway?

Kids and Sexual Stereotypes

2005-06-22T07:00:00.000-04:00

I was brought up by parents who were very educated. I'm sure they'd seen the latest studies that had shown there is no correlation between the toys a child plays with and their sexual preferences later on.

Therefore, my parents tried to be very objective when it came to sexual stereotyping. My brothers were allowed to play with dolls if they wanted to (though the dolls were male dolls), and I was allowed to play with trucks, climb trees, catch tadpoles, and do whatever pleased me. So we never grew up with anxious parents who would snatch a toy away from us (or even try to redirect us) if they thought what we were doing or playing with was "gender innapropriate."

Yet I grew up to be very feminine (people are incredulous when I tell them that I was a tomboy) and my brothers grew up to be very masculine. I should add that we're great parents (in my humble opinion).

So I was shocked, years ago, when my son's father had a conniption about my giving our son a Ken doll (it was really cool: it changed colors in the water) and implied he could become gay (or at least a sissy) if he was allowed to play with it. Later, he threw a fit when I got my son a necklace. No, I'm not talking about a necklace that looked like something Elton John would wear. I'm talking about a black cord with a small silver dragon pendant.

Now, one of my friends has a baby boy that is a little over a year old. His dad is paranoid about everything from what colors the baby can wear (heaven forbid he wear orange, let alone pink!) to what toys he can play with (if he picks up his sister's Barbie, it's taken away from him immediately). Of course, to be brutally honest, this dad looks and acts gay himself. For all I know, he's obsessed about it because of the teasing that he may have experienced.

But I've seen comments in Blog World which imply that there are still many people who believe that if a boy is allowed to play with dolls, he'll become gay.

I thought we had gone past this narrow-minded behavior, as a society. What do you think?

The Perfect Man?

2005-06-12T13:36:00.000-04:00

I just saw the previews for the new movie: The Perfect Man with Hillary Duff, and had to explain to my boyfriend's daughter, Bugs, that we will not be going to see it (unless I'm misunderstanding what the movie is about). It's too bad that Hillary Duff is in it, because she will entice many people to go see this film.

I told her that it seems to be sending all the wrong messages to young women. First, a woman does not need a man to complete her life. Secondly, I don't think it is that easy to define the perfect man and I don't want Hollywood trying to do it for us.

One of my favorite sayings is "Men are like parking spaces. The good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped." Perhaps that can be said for women, as well.

I don't think that kids need a father, as long as the mother is doing a good job. Of course it's nice for the mom to have a helpmate, and I don't deny that men bring a different (and sometimes helpful) perspective into the household. But I think it's very wrong to send out the message that families are incomplete without a father figure.

For instance, Elizabeth Elliot (the famous missionary) seemed to do just fine with her own brood, even after her husband became snack food for the cannibal tribe they were trying to convert. Don't get me wrong - I don't believe in missionary work for the most part (that's a topic for my frankly blog) but I'm pointing out that she was a very good woman who soldiered on when she was widowed, and didn't go running off to find a daddy substitute.

Our Kids Are What They Eat

2005-06-10T20:34:00.000-04:00

(Thanks to Polanco for this news article)

BY PAUL H.B. SHIN
DAILY NEWS STAFF WRITER:
A coalition of parents with autistic children is launching a stinging lobbying campaign against President Bush today, accusing him of reneging on a campaign-trail promise to ban mercury from vaccines.The group, Unlocking Autism, will deliver letters to the White House and Capitol Hill, urging Bush and lawmakers to prohibit use of Thimerosal, a vaccine preservative that contains mercury.Whether mercury actually causes autism is still disputed among scientists but advocates note autism has been rising dramatically in the past 20 years.

Interesting about the thimerosol. It's also in many eyedrops and saline solutions. Great way to 'mainline' mercury, huh? I didn't know mercury was in the stuff. To what degree, I wonder, and why did the FDA approve it?

I remember playing with the mercury from a broken thermometer when I was little. Scary, now!

When I was younger I was a staunch conservative. Now I'm merely a pragmatist. That makes me fit in with neither party. However, I'd like to point out something that I wouldn't have dreamed of saying years ago: I think we need to look to our food supply.

Over the years, there has been increasing evidence that all the growth hormones and antibiotics that we're introducing into our meat supply is doing us nothing but harm. Studies seem to indicate that the earlier sexual maturing of our children may have something to do with the growth hormones in the meat which they eat. And antibiotic resistant bacteria in humans is on the rise, perhaps due to our endless exposure to meats which came from animals that were treated (routinely) with antibiotics.

Then we have Mad Cow Disease. This is a truly serious situation, by the way. If you don't believe me, go to a mainstream organization and read up on it. Go to consumerreports.com and do a search with the words mad cow and see what you come up with. It will turn your hair white.

I tried vegetarianism for a year when I was younger and it wasn't for me. A good friend, who is a scientist, convinced me that our bodies are made to be omnivorous. But I think we need to start demanding more of our food suppliers. Either that, or *gulp*, go organic.

The New Florida Law Concerning Sex Offenders: Will it Help?

2005-05-04T14:03:00.000-04:00

We have had too many abductions and near-abductions taking place in Florida. As a result, Gov. Jeb Bush recently signed The Jessica Lunsford Act. It's supposedly the toughest legislation of any US state to tackle child sex offenders. This is appalling, since I would have believed that every state would have such laws in place.

Here's what the Jessica Lunsford Act is all about: Pedophiles convicted in Florida of abusing children under the age of 12 will be handed mandatory prison sentences ranging from 25 years to life. They will be subject to GPS satellite tracking for life after their eventual release. Current offenders will get the satellite tracking if they even do as much as violate their parole, probation, or 'forget' to register where they're living.

I think it's a good law, as far as it goes. However, I think that we make a mistake when we hand out stiffer penalties to pedophiles who attack children who are only under 12 years of age. We need to focus on all sex offenders and other ex-felons who were charged with violent crimes.

How quickly we seem to have forgotten Carly Bruscia. Her murderer (Joseph P. Smith) had no prior sex convictions, though there was an attempted kidnapping charge in his past. Sarah Lunde's murderer was a convicted sex offender, but he was accused of raping women, not children.

Today, it is reported in the St. Pete Times that Jose Antonio Hubbard tried to grab a 6 year old girl, and was (thankfully) thwarted this time. He had just been released from jail for domestic abuse, but has no sex crimes in his record either.

There have been other kidnapping attempts lately, too. Are they copycat crimes? Will the new laws make them think twice? Common sense tells us that the answers are YES to both questions.

But, until we begin to mete out stiffer penalties for all violent crimes, we are merely applying bandaids to wounds that need stitches. It just isn't enough.

Reverse Racism

2005-04-23T16:10:00.000-04:00

You know, I was never exposed to racism. I was raised, and intermingled with, people of different races and nationalities all my life.

I remember my mother and father telling me (in shocked whispers) that my grandfather was a racist and that if I ever dated a person of a different color, I shouldn't tell him about it. I was puzzled, because my parents were never that idiotic. I was taught by them, at an early age, to examine the person for what they were and what they believed - not for what they looked like.

Years later, I went on to do exactly what would have sent my grandfather into an apoplectic fit. I once joked to a friend that a summary of my love life sounded like the beginning of one of those old jokes: "A Jew, a Black, a Filipino, a Native American and a Cuban..."

When I settled down, my other half was of a different race than I was. Did I care? Not in the least. Being a moderate in the political arena, I couldn't care less about a career in politics (neither party wants a moderate), and who else would care? An employer? Nah. I've found that most employers don't give a rat's behind about whom you're with anymore- or if you're even married to him or her. And, overall, I think that's healthy: I don't want to be evaluated for my personal life. Let me prove myself professionally instead!

And I do.

But now we come to a different issue: Reverse racism.

The St. Pete Times recently released a video showing a Kid Out of Control (KOOC) who was SERIOUSLY misbehaving. The mother of this KOOC is suing the police department for hauling away the little monster in handcuffs.

When most people see that video, they say..."What took so long???"

But when Dr. Clayton Wilcox, Superintendent of Schools, asked for the public's opinions, he got an earful.

At first, the vast majority of the participants spoke positively about the way the school handled the situation, and suggested what common sense tells us all: the primary reason for a KOOC is a bad parent. Discipline begins in the home.

But then, interestingly enough, reverse racism began to rear it's ugly head.

People who never made a racist comment, or (in my case) never saw race as an issue, were accused of racism.

Why, oh why, do we have to continually pull out the worn-down Race Card? Can't we deal with the reality of an issue by itself? Are some people so threatened by the truth that they feel the need to attack others? I think the answer is yes. Reverse racism is the lazy man's answer to an argument. If you aren't trained in debate, if you aren't intellectual enough to discuss a problem rationally, then accuse your opponent of being a racist. If you're lucky, you'll confuse the issue enough that you'll win by default.

Perhaps there is someone that is mentally ill enough to actually believe racism was involved in this incident. But any rational person who reviews the tape realizes that everything was done by the book, as it should have been.

Let's not get off topic any more, or tolerate others who try to. Let's deal with the issues, be adult about it. If we're not good at debating a situation, then we should either take debate classes, get educated, or shut up.

Because Reverse Racism harms everyone, helps no one, and solves nothing.

Guns in Schools

2005-03-24T19:40:00.000-05:00

We've been so blessed. The Tampa Bay Area (Florida) hasn't had that many incidents of kids bringing guns to school. And we haven't had any fools go on a killing spree, yet. With any luck, we never will.

But I am concerned about the possibility. The latest school shooting took place in Minnesota, when a teenage boy (who claimed to be a Nazi) went ballistic and killed 9 people.

What causes such a thing? I think that no matter how many experts weigh in on that, no one really knows for sure. To find out what causes a kid to go off the deep-end only matters if we can use that knowlege to find a way to prevent it from happening again. And, that will never be feasible. Why? Because there are many kids out there with a variety of issues, but most of them never get to the point that they arm themselves and go searching for innocent victims.

So, instead of asking again and again 'what caused this?', we need to ask how to prevent it.

Solution to Kids Out of Control (KOOCs)

2005-03-23T20:16:00.000-05:00

I've been discussing the fact that most KOOCs are a direct result of bad and/or neglectful parenting. (I suppose that neglectful parenting is bad parenting, actually.)

Here's the easy solution:

Yearly mandatory parenting classes for all parents. Sure, it would be an inconvenience for those of us that are dedicated, involved parents. But in the end, the inconvenience would be worth it if the classroom bully's parents suddenly realized what they were doing wrong. And it would give us all a baseline we can refer to when problems do occur.

Just imagine: The classroom bully (let's call him Hannibal) kicks little Tomeka and makes her cry. Tomeka's teacher or parents can call Hannibal's father and say "Hey, Hannibal Sr., do you remember when they told us that kicking is unacceptable?" And Hannibal's father can also do what he was trained to do: punish Hannibal for bad behavior. If Hannibal continues to behave badly, we move to...

Solution 2: Hold parents legally accountable for their children's behavior. How should we do this? We can always get into the details later. But my favorite idea is a monetary fine. There's nothing that creates more of an impression than money going out of your pocket.

Let's face it, folks. We've arrived at a time where bad parents aren't going to get any better unless they're forced to. And right now, they've got a free ride.

FCAT Standards

2005-03-23T19:58:00.000-05:00

Some parents are complaining that there is no individual child learning allowed for in the public school system. I also get the impression that many parents complaining about the FCAT feel that the learning schedule is much more rigorous.

Yet, overall, studies show that students are learning more as a result of the new standards.

Although I agree that it would be wonderful if each child could be given exclusive attention, that is what home schooling is for. We have standardized testing because we can't customize an individual FCAT for each child. And if we did, we'd lose sight of the fact that all kids need to be learning the same things, at the same pace. If there's room for extra, that's great. If not, that's up to the parents to supplement.

None of us has ever had 'individual child learning' growing up. It wasn't feasible then, and it isn't feasible now in a classroom setting. Of course we'd love our children to get more attention than they are getting, but that is for us as parents to address at home.

When we were kids, our parents were involved in our schooling (well, most of our parents were). They asked us what we did in school that day, what our homework was, and what tests were coming up. Now we live in a different world, and most of us work full time or part time. But that doesn't excuse us from being good parents. We have to make time for these kids. Remember, we made the choice to take on the responsibility in the first place.

Let's face it, much of the failure in the school system is the parents. I have no problem saying this, because I work very hard at being a good parent.

Now, I'm not saying that the parents who are complaining are bad or lazy parents. I don't know. But I know that we are often too quick to blame the wrong people and excuse the ones that are truly at fault.

That's how the problems start to snowball: too many people are saying "it's not my job" and not enough people are trying to do their job.

Jessica Lunsford: This Can Happen to Our Kids

2005-03-23T09:10:00.000-05:00

As details emerge from the Jessica Lunsford case, I am struck by the fact that this could happen to any of our children. It only took one night when someone let their guard down and forget to lock the front door, and a crazed killer snuck in and snatched Jessica. Maybe he'd been trying the locks every night until that one night. Maybe everyone had gone to bed, each thinking that the other adult(s) in the house had locked the door.

Jessica's father says that if he'd known this predator lived nearby, he'd have been on his guard. He's asking for a better way to track sex offenders, and stiffer laws to punish them.

It's about time.

The sad thing is that we, as a nation, never make the appropriate moves until it's too late. After all, so many of us knew that 9/11 was bound to happen. We just didn't know when, or how, or where. Yet all the signs pointed in that direction. But the government chose to put off addressing the possibility of it until it was too late. Why be negative? Let's focus on something catchy, like healthcare reform or gays in the military.

Child abductions seem to be increasing. Are they copycat crimes? Or are these crimes that never were documented in the past, and we're simply under the illusion that they're increasing in numbers?

I recently read a report stating that the FBI does believe that violent crimes are increasing. They weren't simply underreported years ago, they're increasing in number.

Let's address the whys later. For now, let's focus on how we can avoid our children becoming another statistic.

Run, don't walk, to http://www3.fdle.state.fl.us/sexual_predators/search.asp? and put in your zipcode only. Apparently other data just tends to confuse the system.

Here you'll see screens full of the sexual offenders and predators that live in your area. Scary, huh? And these are the known ones. Show your kids their pictures, find out where they live and find a way to route your kids away from there. Make sure your neighbors are aware of this as well.

I have a sexual offender who lives near the park in my neighborhood. He preys on small boys under 16 years old. I've shown my kids his picture and warned them about how he might approach them, or how he might alter his looks. You need to do the same thing.

If someone you know doesn't have access to computers, tell them to use the public library's computers, or let them borrow yours.

This is affecting us all. In our family, we've even made the difficult choice to restrict my children to playing in the backyard. They can't run around the neighborhoods like we did when we were children; playing hopskotch, catching tadpoles, playing hide-&-seek. They've lost the freedom of childhood that they should have been entitled to.

My kids are under 'house arrest' and constant supervision...because sexual offenders and predators aren't.

The system is broken, and I don't know if it will ever be fixed. But one thing's for certain. As Dorothy said, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto."

Survival of the Fittest

2005-03-22T19:23:00.000-05:00

My boyfriend is a 'fixer.' He sees Kids Out of Control (KOOCS), or doing something potentially dangerous with their parents watching, and he wants to do something about it. If I don't stop him, he'll run up to the parents to tell them off.

I think he's finally stopped doing this for the most part. Sure, he'll still say something if he sees a toddler left in a car while the mom is in a store buying cigarettes. It's not the child's fault that their parents are complete idiots and placing him in an unsafe situation.

But, overall, I tell him that it's Survival of the Fittest, or ... Less Competition For My Children When They Grow Up. And he sees the reasoning behind it.

In my grandparents generation, everyone believed in hard work, honesty, and proper behavior. That's simply not 'cool' enough for many people now. I think that's marvellous. My kids will be able to climb all over these 'cool' types that never bothered to learn proper grammar or how to work hard to get what they want.

So, please - everyone - encourage your kids to act like Eminem. Tell them to dress like Courtney Love. Let them get those really obvious tattoos that shout "I'm totally and completely irresponsible." With any luck they'll get matching body piercings. And train them to say this simple phrase: "Do you want fries with that?"

Disciplining Kids

2005-03-22T16:15:00.000-05:00

My friends often call me for advice. That doesn't make me The Discipline Guru. My kids have their share of moments, and there are times when I just want to throttle them like Homer Simpson throttles Bart. (Attention HRS: I don't do this, I just fantasize about it).

But, my kids are virtually perfect (overall). They're creative, witty, and yet they are self-controlled and polite. My friends ask what I'm doing, and one recently called and told me that I should write a book about it. She also told me that she'd give me all her child support if I'd just raise her child for her, and let her visit on the weekends. I assumed she was kidding, though she did have a note of hysteria in her voice.

I hate self-help books. Especially the child rearing ones. I believe they're a waste of time, energy, and money. There are books where you're supposed to be ridden with angst about your child's feelings and there are books that advocate beating them.

These last authors believe, as the White Queen said, "Speak roughly to your little boy, and beat him if he sneezes: He only does it to annoy, because he knows it teases." (Lewis Carrol, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland). One of the ones that falls into that category is Dr. Charles Dobson, in my opinion. Please don't bother writing to me to tell me that Dr. Dobson is God's gift to parents. I've read Dare to Discipline, and I don't agree.

I tell ya what I'm gonna do... I'll save you all the trouble.

Here's what you need to know to be a successful parent: Punish kids when they do something they know that they shouldn't do. Use your common sense. If you don't have any, borrow someone else's. Follow through with your threats of punishment and be consistent about it, and make sure it's something that they don't like.

Now, memorize the above paragraph and you'll be set. Simple.

My friend 'Julie' called me a couple weeks ago, after her daughter had yelled at her "Are you done yet??? Shut your trap!!!"

(Let's call her daughter 'Elvira', as in 'Elvira, Mistress of the Dark.' It's very appropriate.)

Julie wanted to know what she should do.

"Are you kidding?" I asked. "Ground her!"

"How should I do that?" asked Julie hesitantly.

"Well, what does Elvira like to do?" I prompted.

Julie named off things like Watch TV, Play With Her Friends, Play on the Computer, etc.

"OK," I said, "tell her that she can't do any of those things for the entire weekend. If you can find it, get her a movie or a book on how to behave with adults and make her do a book report on it. Don't give in just because she bats her eyes at you, or if it's convenient for you to give in."

Julie sat down with Elvira immediately and told her she was grounded. On Monday, I called her. "How did it go?" I asked.

"Fine," Julie said, "she's been remarkably pleasant! I'm truly shocked. We had a great evening watching old movies on Saturday night."

"I thought you weren't allowing her to watch any TV...?" I said, feeling my eyebrows go up.

"Oh, I was tough. I stuck to that. I didn't let her watch any of her TV programs," Julie said, "but I wasn't going to give up watching mine."

And this, my friends, is why Julie continues to have problems with her daughter. In fact, Elvira called 911 the other day and complained to them that she was abused, because her mother made her clean the house. And, instead of punishing her daughter for a frivolous 911 call, Julie only told Elvira that she had been naughty.

Elvira is only 9 years old. Can you imagine what a nightmare she could become when she's a teenager?

Julie called me the other day to tell me that she had spoken with Elvira's teacher, and the teacher told Julie that Elvira was passing nasty notes in class threatening her other classmates, and that Elvira was 'moody' and talked back to the teacher.

Julie was crying. "I can't believe it," she sobbed.

"I'm not surprised at all," I said, as gently as I could.

"Why?" Julie asked, "Why couldn't I see it all???"

What I told Julie is that perhaps she was too close to the situation to see it for what it truly was. That's a good, placating thing to say, but it wasn't the truth. I knew that.

And I was torn. Should I have told her the truth? The truth was that Julie didn't want to see the problems, because they were easier to ignore. To discipline a child properly requires self-discipline, and not many parents have that any more.

Kids Out of Control

2005-03-22T15:13:00.000-05:00

OK, so here we are in Florida, beating our chests about not enough parents who care about the issues in the school system here. I'm not surprised, and I'm not disappointed. Of course there aren't many parents that care. Look at the way their kids behave in the classroom and in public! If the parents really cared, and felt their kids' behavior reflected on them, their children would be polite, well-mannered, and orderly.

...so... obviously there aren't many parents who truly care anymore.

Their kids attend school because it's mandatory. With family values slipping, and education is no longer a priority, what is a kid going to do? There's no motivation to do well. Why should you do well, when doing OK is just as acceptable?

I know some kids that are more worried about the next contestant on American Idol than what their grades are, and since their parents have the same priorities, why are we surprised?

So we must simply deal with the fact that most parents don't care, and move on into reality.

Let's address the real question. Since most parents don't care, and kids are out of control, what can be done so that we can get better control of these kids in the classrooms?

The 5 year old girl that was recently taken into police custody (in the Tampa Bay Area) should have been charged. That is the only way her mother would be forced to confront the situation of a Kid Out of Control (KOOC). The courts could order mandatory counseling for both of them and the problem would be on its way to being solved. Instead, the mom is threatening a lawsuit!

Many of us find this hysterically funny. I mean, get this: instead of hanging her head in shame, the mother continues to put herself out there - Poster Mom of Bad Parenting. It's as entertaining as Jerry Springer.

We hear some people blame the police for subduing a child that was physically and verbally abusive. This girl wasn't just smarting off a little to the teacher, she was downright nasty. She probably learned it at home, but whatever the reason there is no excuse for such behavior.

In my child's class last year, another little girl went out of control, screaming at the teacher, kicking other students and making them cry. It was her parents' fortune that she didn't make my child cry. Can you say lawsuit? Mr. Rogers can. Her parents would have been paying for my child's college education.

What can be done??? So far, the 'rubber room' suggestion is the best I've heard. If they don't want to learn, why force them? And why force their annoying presence on the children who do want to learn?

Just have some rubber rooms set up in each school complete with entertainment. Tell their parents that they are now being 'rubber roomed' and if the parents then agree to get control of these little monsters, they'll be re-inserted into their classrooms. Otherwise, they can spend the entire year in the rubber room - learning nothing and contributing nothing. And they can do this year in, and year out, until they are adults. They can then go out into the world and find a job that doesn't take any thought. We will always need day laborers, or their equivalent.